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The accidental text on purpose



This was the longest Curb episode yet since the premiere. When creating the season, was this when you realized you had to talk to HBO about pushing the episode lengths?

Usually, the outlines are about 10 pages. This episode was 12 or 13 pages. When we were shooting, I kept telling Larry this episode was never going to cut down to 30 minutes and yes, this was the show where I told Larry he was going to have to talk to somebody at HBO about the lengths. I didn’t want to shoot it all and then have to edit it down. We could either cut stuff before we shoot it, or we could shoot it and he could tell somebody this show was going to be long. But just because he and I had that conversation, doesn’t mean Larry actually had the conversation with HBO until after we finished shooting. (Laughs.)

Can you take me through the process of having so many ideas — the accidental text, the premature “honey,” the selective heeding of a doctor call — and how you end up bringing them all together?

This show started with the “accidental text on purpose.” Everyone has gotten texts that weren’t met for them, but Larry’s genius is to manipulate the person on the receiving end. I just want to apologize right now if there was anyone out there who was routinely doing this: I am so sorry that we ruined your scam. You have about a week to get all of your accidental-on-purpose texts in before everyone has watched the episode. But we really wanted to do that idea and we knew that was an idea that could jump from story to story. Just like in life, when you hear about a good scam, the first thing you do is say, “Why didn’t I think of that?” and the next thing you say is, “I’m going to do that.”

The second thing that the show started out with was the doctor not heeding the call. Larry has had that idea for a little bit, and that was the whole reason we were on a plane. We rarely go on a plane so once we did, we wanted to pack it full of more plane stuff. The show is longer because that plane segment is almost half a show. Plane sets are sort of expensive. We had to go out to Ontario International Airport to shoot and we wanted to fill the day. That led to all the really funny stuff with June Diane Raphael. Those two stories started it, and then the next thing was the water, which had happened to Larry in a house of a person to be unnamed.

When he was served unfiltered L.A. water, did he say something to the host?

When it happened, he definitely said something to me. Whether he said something to them I’m going to leave unanswered. There are two very L.A. stories in this show and they are both about water. One is tap water. For most people in L.A., giving them tap water is like you are giving them poison. And then the second was the dirty car. Having a dirty car in Los Angeles is like ordering a beer at a business lunch, it’s just not done. People want to know what is wrong with you, economically and psychologically, that your car would be dirty. If you have one, you are less than.

Did you toy with options for who the car culprit was going to be?

There were still stories we trimmed out of this episode. There used to be a thread in the show that Larry had not seen the end of Arabesque and didn’t want anyone to ruin it. We had an alternate ending where at the end of the episode, he came out and in the dirt on his car was the ending spoiled for him. But then we realized it was too many stories and once we put the penis on the car, it was sort of done. It’s hard to top — in Funkhouser’s words — a “14-foot cock.” It’s actually pretty difficult to keep a cock car looking its best during a rainy L.A. winter. We had to always make sure the car was in a safe garage. We had to keep replenishing the dirt and redrawing the penis — it was a real endeavour.

Whose penis drawing ended up winning out? It’s funny that Netflix’s American Vandal also centred an entire season around a similar question.

I think it might be [the episode’s director] Larry Charles’ shaft drawing and my balls drawing. We had a practice session with the car because we wanted to see which side was going to have the drawing and which one would have all the swear words. It’s a pretty small car. So we brought the car into our offices and all took turns writing terrible words and insults to Larry and drawing penises. That was what I got paid to do that day. When you’re drawing a giant penis, there has to be a lot of consideration taken for what the balls are going to look like, or if there are going to be any balls at all. It turns out, especially for drawing something, the balls really make the penis. Without it, it could just be a stick with a lump at the end. All of these iterations were examined closely.

Then you had the girlfriend storylines. What was the inspiration for Elizabeth Perkins’ character, and what was it like to watch her spar with David?

We had such a great guest cast in this episode. Andrea Savage was so funny. Ed Begley Jr. was a hoot. June is one of the funniest people around, and then Elizabeth Perkins was such a great, steely foil to Larry. We wanted Funkhouser to have a girlfriend that he was both a little bit in love with and also a little afraid of. We wanted to make sure that we never felt sorry for Elizabeth’s character, Marilyn, so we took great pains to make her steely and finicky. That’s why right off the top, she kicks Larry off the arm of the chair. We wanted to make sure no one was going to feel sorry for her when Larry started calling her out about her tap water. But she and Larry, boy, they got into it. She was matching Larry blow for blow. We have not seen the last of her. She and Funkhouser are having a rough patch and, like all relationships on the show, the rough patch was caused by Larry. But Funkhouser really likes her, so they’re going to try again.

Bob Einstein, J.B. Smoove and Larry David on <em>Curb Your Enthusiasm.</em>
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‘The Square’ Interview with Ruben Östlund, Claes Bang and Elisabeth Moss




Director Ruben Östlund is an adventurer of Swedish film and a hard man to satiate. It is seen in his Oscar-nominated film – The Square that has received much attention. Here is an excerpt from the interview with The Playlist as actors Claes Bang and Elisabeth Moss share their experience with the movie and the director.

Claes Bang: Can I tell you a funny story from Cannes?

Elisabeth Moss: Yeah.

Claes Bang: When we were [at Cannes] there was this Screen International journalist, Wendy Mitchell, and she saw the film, she loved it, and she started [rooting] for me as best actor. She put on her Facebook page she put “The Daily Bang” and posted a new photo of me every day. Invented the hashtag #BangforBond.

Elisabeth Moss: So good!


Claes Bang : At the end of the festival, all these predictions come out, right? My agents were fanning me. “It says in Variety now that you’re gonna win. It says in the Daily Telegraph you’re gonna win. It says in The Guardian.” It said everywhere and I started fucking believing the hype. I did. I started believing the hype, because everybody was saying, “It’s an amazing film. It’s so fucking good, but you’re not gonna win the big thing because it’s too funny.” So when we got that phone call on Sunday…

The Playlist: And they told Ruben to come, too, it wasn’t just…

Claes Bang: No, no. They invite the entire crew that is there. So they said to come and I was like, “Fuck, I’m gonna get [an] award.” So when they said, “And the award for Best Actor goes to,” I was almost fucking getting my ass out of the seat and then they said, “Joaquin Phoenix.” I was like, “Okay, I’ll stay put.” Then the next prize went, the next prize went, the next prize went and there was just one left. I leaned over to Rupert and I said, “Unless they’re really fucking with us, we’re gonna get the big one.” We got the big one and I was like, really, really so fucking happy about it, and he was, and everything was exploding, and then five minutes later I was like, “Wait a fucking second. What the fuck was that? He stole my award,that fucking Swedish wanker.” (Laughs.) So what happened is that all the people that get the awards, they go off to a press conference.

Elisbeth Moss: Yeah.

The Playlist: Yeah, I was at the press conferences.

Claes Bang: There’s an amazing party that starts out on the top of the Palais overlooking this harbor with all the boats and everything. Then you go down to the beach where there’s a department of a French restaurant that’s just the most amazing food, champagne, people in tuxes. I mean, amazing. I started to get a little bit pissed. I got quite drunk and then Ruben came back from the press conference and I saw him over there, and I was like, “I’m fucking gonna hurt him now. I’m fucking gonna go over there and kick his ass.”

The Playlist: Really?


Claes Bang: I was so mad. I was really … and I have done really, really stupid stuff when I’m drunk. So, I said to my wife, “We need to leave now.” So we left.

Elisabeth Moss: That’s the danger of believing the hype! That’s why after eight nominations I will never convince me of anything else other than that I’m gonna lose.

Claes Bang: And Ruben texted me something at [1 AM asking] “Where the fuck are you? I mean, we won and everybody’s asking for you.” I mean, everybody there had seen that film and unless you know Ruben, you don’t know that he is the guy, but everybody knew that I was sort of the lead of the film. And I was just…

Elisabeth Moss: Gone.

Claes Bang: I was gone.

The Playlist: But when you woke up the next morning with the hangover were you at least excited?

Claes Bang: I had to get up like, fuck dead early the next morning. That was one of the things. I had a show in Edinburgh that next night.

The Playlist: But when you were going to the airport, on the plane, you must have been thinking “Holy cow!” because when you make a movie you don’t necessarily think it’s going to win the Palme d’Or at Cannes.

Claes Bang: No, and my wife, she was so fucking mad with me. She said, “We’re leaving the party of our lives. There’s boom boom boom and they all want to talk to you, and now we’re leaving.” “Yes,” I said, “This is not where I’m gonna kill a director or try and break the Palme d’Or in half to say ‘This is mine’ or something.”

Elisabeth Moss: But how Ruben Ostlund would that have been if the lead actor and the director got into a fight?


Claes Bang: Exactly.

The Playlist: Yes!

Claes Bang: When I told him this story, because I’ve told him and I’ve told the press and everything now, he was just like, “This is the best story of the whole shoot.”

Elisabeth Moss: Yeah, it’s the greatest!

The Playlist: He’s gonna put this in a movie now. You realize this, right?

Claes Bang: It’s cool. It’s fine. It’s no problem. Listen, what I actually find quite funny is that when you think about it, it’s like, “Oh my God, no. Did I do that?” But when I tell the story people are like, “Finally, someone is coming out and saying I was really, really disappointed not to win.”

Elisabeth Moss: Right. Totally, yes.

Claes Bang: It was literally something like five or six places where it said, “He’s gonna win it.” I fucking believed it.

Elisabeth Moss: Of course. It’s dangerous!

The Playlist: By the way, I’m one of those people that do the stuff that say “these people are going to win.”

Elisabeth Moss: Right, exactly!

The Playlist: So, I guess I apologize?

Elisabeth Moss: No, by all means. It’s your job, but it’s like…

Claes Bang: I have this thing also that was like, “Okay, they really invited a rookie to Cannes. Now we’re gonna fuck with him.”

The Playlist: It’s not personal!

Claes Bang: “We’re gonna build him up, we’re gonna make him believe, and then-”

Elisabeth Moss: “We’re gonna take it away. Just to teach him a lesson.”

The Playlist: Elisabeth, you weren’t at the ceremony. Were you there for the premiere and then you left?

Elisabeth Moss: I went to Antibes which is like 45 minutes, a half an hour away or something. Nobody asked me to go to the Palme d’Or Ceremony.

The Playlist: Oh, they didn’t call and tell you? I thought they gave everyone 24 hours notice.

Claes Bang: No. For instance, if you’re in Japan and you’ve gone back to Japan and you’re getting an award, they will let you know in time so you can get on a plane.

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Christo, you and your wife Jeanne-Claude were born on the exact same day in 1935, but in completely different countries. Do you believe in destiny?

Jeanne-Claude always said, “There are a million people born on the same day.” But it happened that we met, that’s all. That is something not unusual. But there are many things that are not destiny. You make your own destiny.

You worked together for nearly 50 years. Would you have become the same artist without her?

It’s the same question to ask, “What would happen if I were Chinese?” (Laughs) We cannot discuss these things – if, if, if – there are no ifs. After living for 80 years, there are no ifs. I can only say one if and it was that I was rather lucky to escape in 1957 to the West. I had never been outside of Bulgaria until 1956 and if I didn’t go to the West, things would have probably been different.

The Soviets had a very strict policy against modern art so you might have not made art at all.

I was drawing all the time as a little boy, like 5 or 6 years old, and it was at this age that I decided to be an artist. There was never a thought about anything else. But it’s true, in the late ’40s and early ’50s most modern art was not permitted to be seen in the Soviet Bloc countries. There were some very bad reproductions and old books… I desperately tried to go beyond Bulgaria and the Soviet Bloc, but even going to other communist countries was very difficult. Fortunately my aunt and my uncle were living in Prague and finally I succeeded in finding a way to visit them. And I was totally flabbergasted by Prague!


It was the most Western country. Even before the chance to fully escape came into view, I had already decided that I was never going to go back to Bulgaria! I was going to stay in Prague. I was young, like 21 years old, and when you’re young and you discover the relatively small freedom of the Western art in Czechoslovakia and Prague in the late ’50s, suddenly you dream of going to Paris! And this is how the stage was set for me to go to Paris.

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Ms. Roš, what are the main challenges in Slovenian cuisine today?

I think Slovenia is slowly, slowly stepping on the world gastronomic map. But my generation of chefs needs to fight for every single step, and every decision is opening a new door. If you work in Italy or Germany, and you cook well, sooner or later you will get the recognition that you need — there is the Michelin Guide, there is Gault Millau, there is the L’Espresso Guide. While in Slovenia, you can be really good, but up to the moment when the international community acknowledges you, you are actually no one.

You have been the head chef of Hiša Franko in Kobarid for almost 20 years — and it wasn’t until this year that you were recognized as the number one female chef by the World’s 50 Best Restaurants academy.

Right, it’s a very, very slow process. Everybody travels for food to Copenhagen, London, or Paris, but who knows where Kobarid is? So it has been a long, long struggle and fight. It doesn’t have only to do with the quality of the restaurant; you have to prove that you are worth certain awards three times more than in developed countries.

“Creativity is something that does not come only from our childhood — it has a lot to do with our own personality.”

I guess the former Yugoslavia doesn’t necessarily come to mind as a haven for creativity in fine dining. What was it like growing up there in the 1990s?

Well, my mother was actually a brilliant cook. She was a journalist and a very creative person, so our meals at home were very colorful and never repeated. But if I think of the food from my childhood, I think of a simple pasta dish with homemade tomato sauce. It really was a super flavorful meal, with a drop of olive oil on the top and with no cheese. That was the most loved meal when I was a child! That is what they call, “happy food.” You know, my children would kill for it.

My parents lived through the communist regime and told me they used to get so excited over simple things like bananas because they were so rare.

Yes but you know, Yugoslavia never had a very strict organization of the country — the borders were open and we could travel. Tito was a “bon vivant” and he was letting his people have a pretty free life. So Yugoslavia had a lot of good things as well. I think Yugoslavia was a place with a lot of creative people; culture was super strong, especially in Zagreb and Belgrade. But I think that creativity is something that either is in a person or is not. Let’s say I have two children and they are both raised in the same way. The girl is super creative and totally irrational, while the boy is totally rational and not creative at all. I think it is something that does not come only from our childhood or from our upbringing or from the regime in which we lived in — it has a lot to do with our own personality.

Do you feel more creative and irrational, or the other way around?

Oh, I’m too instinctive sometimes! You see, my problem — and sometimes it is also a good thing — is that I don’t question a lot. I actually just jump in the water and swim and I am a kind of personality that is never happy with average results. At Hiša Franko, I never questioned myself about how it is going to be like, especially because I never had any prior experience of seeing how a restaurant really works and I’m completely self-taught so it was like a total experiment and we are still making corrections.

Source: The Talk

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